Yesterday the storm has knocked down the electricity and I did not have access to internet. At least I had laptop with charged battery so that I could write this article.
Here is another point which came through out of the conflict with my friend few days ago. Yesterday we had a conversation about this whole incident. And again my friend started to get angry and raise his voice. I told him that I refuse to continue conversation with him as long as he continues to use anger and shouting at me. He stopped for a while but then he started to raise his voice again. And I was next to him and I could hear him perfectly without shouting. So this was not about him communicating with me. It was about forcing his point and beliefs on me.
I asked him few times to leave me alone and not talk with me as long as he is angry and shouts at me. He came at me with contra argument that I am his friend and I should accept him the way he is. It was not about stopping and looking at the point why he is shouting at me but it was about accepting him the way he is. Shouting in anger is an abuse and accepting it would mean that I allow and accept the abuse and thus I am also responsible for it.
I don't accept the abuse and it doesn't matter whether it is my best friend, my father, my wife etc. Abuse is abuse and it is not about me accepting it but it is about you stopping it within you. The same applies to me. If I abuse then I must stop within me and not ask others to accept me the way I am.
I will not allow the abuse just because he is my friend even though he may get pissed off with me and who knows what else - maybe we will not be taking with each other for some time, not see each other etc. But what I will do is that I will do everything possible so that my friend understands that the abuse is not acceptable until it is done.
To be continued...