This is the continuation of the previous article:

MOUNTAIN OF PROBLEMS WITHIN THE RELATIONSHIP - PART 1

I know that once you are in the middle of the mountain of problems and you have frequent conflicts with your partner it is difficult to see that all of this is not only the fault of your partner but it is also your creation and you are equally responsible for all that is happening. But this is the fact and sooner or later you will realize it. It is only your own illusion if you believe that you are perfect and your partner is to blame for everything. How soon you realize it, it is all up to you. Sometimes it may take you few days but sometimes you will only realize it in your last breathe when you are dying. But unfortunately quite often it is already too late because you have already made a decision to leave your partner. And even if you didn't make this decision yourself, you are happy that you are not anymore with him/her due to some external circumstances which have separated you from him/her. It doesn't really matter how it happens. The fact is that you are not with him/her anymore and you are equally responsible for it.

Now... how to deal with the mountain of problems ? First of all you must stop blaming your partner for all of it, take a responsibility equally with him/her and become humble. And this is probably one of the most difficult points in the whole process because without it you are not able to do anything about it for the simple reason that you are not seeing the reality and thus you are not able to apply effective correction to the real cause and instead you are fighting with symptoms. And this will never get you anywhere apart from getting yourself into deeper shit.

Secondly you have to work together with your partner on solving the problems together because the fact is that you both have created it and you both have to un-create them. And for this you have to establish the effective communication. Now... this is extremely important because once you are in the middle of the mountain of problems with frequent discussions and fights you have quite often only one way communication where one of the partner talks, blames and accuses the other one and at the same time he/she doesn't allow the other side to talk. He/she cuts the other side off. And this is not effective communication at all. And this way you will not be able to dissolve your mountain of problems at all but instead this mountain will only get bigger.

To be continued...