Uff... that was an intensive day. This new colleague who was interested to join the project was in a difficult life situation and I offered my help. I offered that she could stay in my house till she gets stable. I was thinking a lot about it and I decided to do so. She accepted this offer and I went to pick her up with me car in the morning. But before we started the car we had a heated conversation. I noticed that she has some fears and issue with the trusting others. I pushed to find the solution but there was resistance. Couple of times she wanted to leave but insisted on finding constructive solution. In the end we managed to decrease the tension that was in the air but we did not find constructive solution in this moment. Anyway we decided to start the engine and go to my house.
After arrival we unpacked the car and we went to the beach. We had some more conversation and everything seemed to be ok. But it only seemed because when we got back home the tension started to rise again. We had another heated up conversation and again we did not find the solution. I realised that this is not going work and I wished that I did not invite this person to my house. But she was already here and she could not go back to the place that she was in the morning. I did not know what to do. I was concerned that I could be stuck and forced to stay with this person for some time. I did not panic though. I realised that I made mistake but I took responsibility for it. Thus I offered that she can stay in my house, get better and find another place without stress. She agreed on it. But this did not stop her from talking and searching for conflict through invalidating me and my way of being. I did not know what to do. But out of nowhere she asked if I could take her back to the place where she was in the morning. It was a hostel and there was no guarantee that she would get her room back. But luckily she did and I was pleased that it all ended up relatively peacefully.
Now... what is the lesson for me from this whole situation ?
At this moment I am confused and I do not understand what was this all about. Apparently our meeting was guided ( from other dimension ) and were supposed to meet and work together. Basically we were both happy to work together but in the end we both realised that this was not possible.
I do not know what else to say in this moment.