I am catching up with posting online my articles.
Today I worked more on the project. I was updating information on my website and I even started to translate it to the second language. This translation does not take so much time and I should finish it tomorrow. This will be a great relief for me and I will be able to take this big task out of my list with pending tasks. And the next step will be to start posting online my JTL articles.
Apart from this I went to the gym today. I am getting stronger. And then I also had an interesting realisation during the training. Normally I do weights. But I also decided to do cardio few days ago. It is really good to do variety of exercises rather than just weights. This is the 3rd time when I do cardio. And I was struggling with it. I needed to push myself to keep running. And then I asked myself a question if I could do anything to enjoy it. And I started to relax and suddenly I was enjoying it. The running on the treadmill became easy and I did twice the distance than last time. That was cool.
Afterwards I went to get some sun while having coffee in the restaurant. While drinking my cup of coffee I started to feel better. I felt that I get more energy and I that I want to go home and start working on my projects. I thought that this was the effect of coffee but then in the last couple of days I did not have this reaction. Anyway I went home and I felt more and more sweetness in my heart. I started to work on the website but then after few minutes I started to feel excited sexually and I decided to masturbate. It was interesting that I felt the sweetness. And this sweetness stays will me all the time. And it is actually getting stronger.
So in the end I do not think that the change was related just to the coffee. Something happened. Something opened in me. Maybe there was something in the air in the last couple of days and I was affected by it. Or maybe I pushed over the difficult moments and I transformed something in me. Because I was facing the point of disappointment that my goals do not manifest in my life etc. But I did not give up and I pushed myself to stay focused and keep walking forward step by step although it was rather difficult.