I have just finished talking to my friend who has let himself to fall. And he's been doing this for at least 2 years. He was running away from facing the problems and he used drugs and alcohol to do it. I was there to help him and assist him but he didn't want it. So he continued falling more and more into the shithole. Within the period of the 2 years he had short moment of "opening his eyes" and trying to make the change but in the end he was falling back again and the whole situation was getting worse all the time - his relationship started to fall apart, he didn't care about anything, he was depressed and sad, sometimes thinking about suicide because he didn't see the sense to live anymore etc.
And no surprise there came a moment when his partner has decided to leave him because the whole relationship was simply a hell. It hit him very strong in his face but later it was interesting to see how this separation has finally made my friend to open his eyes. There was initial stage of being in a state of "I don't care and it doesn't matter" but about 2 weeks later he started to realise that his partner left him for real and then he started to "feel the pain". And this was a critical point of deciding what to do with his life. This moment of pain has opened his eyes for a moment and he could see the fuck up of the illusion that he was living. And while his eyes were open he could make a conscious decision of what to do next - continue running into the illusion of drugs or face the reality and make the change.
He has decided to choose the 2nd option but it was not just an empty decision like it was before. This time his decision was followed by the action - he has stopped taking drugs and drink alcohol and started to make the changes. And interestingly he doesn't really need anybody to be with him every day, push him and remind him about not drinking alcohol and taking the drugs. He started to do sports and take care of himself.
To be continued...